Thanksgiving 2022

Mika souhaite à tous les Américains un joyeux Thanksgiving. (Mika wishes all Americans a happy Thanksgiving. She is Québecoise.)

I use "I have serious news..." to write in the first person about the experience of cancer and the end of life. Why? Writers write to understand their lives: we reach clarity through the discipline of crafting coherent prose. 

But what's in it for you, the reader? A personal essay lets you watch someone else travelling into what may be, for you, an undiscovered country. You have a 40% chance of getting cancer during your lifetime; if you have a partner, there is a 65% chance that at least one of you will get cancer. What's in this for you is that you may learn something from me, or the writers I discuss. 

Future posts will tackle cancer and hope. The next one will be about my old professor, Stephen Jay Gould, and his experience with being diagnosed with cancer. Palliative care doctors have much to say about hope, and I will write about Rena Awdish, Brad Stuart, and surgeon Atul Gawande. Later posts will examine despair, focusing on the death of Susan Sontag and the high rates of depression and suicide among patients. Some patients are stoic and courageous, and here I will write about the cancer experience of Christopher Hitchens. I will write about my religious hopes: Simone Weill, Soren Kierkegaard, and Jürgen Moltmann.

Here's a health update. This month’s cancer mystery is that my throat pain has worsened, yet the CT scans do not show tumour growth. But yesterday, my wife noticed a bloom of small white sores in my mouth and on my tongue. It may be an infection; perhaps it’s a wacky immunotherapy side effect. In either case, it's much better than tumour metastases. 

My well-being is better than you might guess from the last paragraph. We are visiting our family in Utah. I made rotini for 12 adults and four children last night, offering pesto, marinara, and alfredo sauces, with a caesar salad with homemade dressing and croutons. I'm doing my bourbon-maple turkey for the same crowd later today. I am grateful for every minute.

Thank you for reading me. I learn so much when you write comments or emails. Please keep commenting, and share the bill.gardner.substack.com link with anyone who might benefit from these essays.